The First Painting

Time flies. I checked the calendar and saw I posted almost a month ago. No doubt I was very busy. However, things are getting into orders and I, finally, finished first painting.

It seems that I can’t get enough time for sketching and planing. So I just go ahead and pick up my oil brushes. The good thing is because I am thinking about drawings and paintings all the time, and I am observing Ethan all the time, so I “sketch” in my mind all the time, which might help.

Now looking back to when I started the Artist Residency in Motherhood, reread the qestionnarie I did, I feel things are getting better. 🙂

Here attached my manifesto for myself as an artist @ARIM.

In the past, many artists told me that I should not have children if you want to be an artist. I understand why, and partly I agree with them. However at the same time, I disagree. Because becoming a mom is also one of my dreams. I do not think my dream of being an artist is against the dream of being a mom. I want to be both, and I want to be good at both.

Now, with my son in my arms, there are moments, I feel so calm and confident, like the time stopped, like the whole world did not exist. I feel so powerful and so insignificant at the same time. I hope time flies and time freezes at the same time. I am so exhausted but so excited at the same time. I am grateful to life and awed by life at the same time. For all those feelings, I believe they can help me become a better artist, a better painter that I wish to be.

Therefore, I will undergo this self-imposed artist residency in order to fully experience and explore the fragmented focus, nap-length studio time, limited movement and resources and general upheaval that parenthood brings and allow it to shape the direction of my work, rather than working against it.

Qing

09/06/2017

More paintings are coming. :))

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The divergent week

This week I got less time to do watercolor sketches, because of job hunting, finding daycare for Ethan, contacting galleries for exhibition opportunities, and the last few steps of our moving.

However, I got more time to think. What is the direction of my new works? Yes, I want to paint baby, not only because of Ethan. I have this wish for a long time. It starts from a painting by Gerhard Richter  Moritz by Gerhard Richter.

There is something, now let me roughly say it is half-human half-animal, of a little baby. Not saying it is the direction I want to go to, painting little animal-human, just it catches me, and stays. I want a real model, like Ethan, not some photos, to observe, to paint from live. The close observation and spending time with is so important that it is the only way that I can bring out truth.

So happily, at least now, I think I got the sense of what direction this is leading to. I will be upset and depress soon, as soon as I start to sketching for the paintings. But at least now, let me enjoy one flash of happiness.

Next week will be Ethan’s first week in a daycare. I feel very sad and very guilty about it. I want to be with him, especially when he is so young, only two and half months old. However, at the same time, I understand that a better career, can bring him much more than what I am giving now. And I need time to paint.

Wish he will understand and forgive me one day. I love him so much.

Q.Song @ Residency in Motherhood

After having Ethan, my son, in late June, I was anxious about my career as an artist because of those huge changes happening in my life. I looked for help and was introduced by a friend to this self-directed, open-source artist residency for artists who are mothers – An Artist Residency in Motherhood. After some research, I feel this residency idea is beautiful, helpful, and inspiring, and decide to take part in.

Therefore, here I am, starting and structuring A Residency in Motherhood for myself.

Qing @ Residency in Motherhood will start from Sept. 11th, 2017, and end till June 27th, 2018, when my little Ethan is one-year-old. During this residency, I will “fully experience and explore the fragmented focus, na-length studio time, limited movement and resources and general upheaval that parenthood brings and allow it to shape the direction of my art work, rather than working against it.” (Residency in Motherhood manifesto)

This blog will be my residency working diary, in which I will weekly update my thoughts, plans, sketches, etc. And here is a rough weekly goal for Sept, 2017:

  • 1 working diary;
  • 3 painting sketches;
  • 5 drawing sketches;
  • finish the sketches and start the first oil painting in Sept.

Okay. 🙂

Talk to you later.

And here is an inspiring article you might like too: You Can Be a Mother and Still Be a Successful Artist, By Marina Cashdan.

Ethan, Sept. 9th, 2017

Ethan, Sept. 9th, 2017